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    Monday, February 8, 2010

    I bare my teeth

    I went home with Zhi Hen(g)(?) today after CCA and he's in Sec 1 express. I told him my 'life story' throughout the whole journey home and I realised how much I have seriously changed. As in c.h.a.n.g.e. In terms of appearance, thinking, sense. I thought him how to study well because I've regretted but it's not too late yet. I still have 2 more years.

    My Maths have improved... Not a lot but I tried at least. I can't stop studying now because I know if I don't wake up I can't and will not anymore. My mind for the past 2 years in Secondary school was malfunctioning. To think that I can go to the extend of thinking that studies are not important and not everything. But I realise today how tough is it for me to handle my foundations in work and studies, even life. I depend too much on others to comforting me when I'm down. I can't pluck myself up or even stand on the right path properly.

    Because of that 20min journey bus ride with Zhi Hen(g) home I saw my true self. Wanting to study even harder and told him not to regret like me. Miss Vannessa said today, "Hurt is not about boyfriend girlfriend saying you're ugly or what, it is regret." I think not studying hard and go into express was really a big mistake and only now I've woken up, it's too late. But still, it's only start of the term and I can still repent on my mistakes. With my friends helping me now I can change and I will work harder. This CA1 I might not score well but SA1 I will do my best into improving on my results.

    Getting into Lasalle is still my dream but I've to focus on my studies now. I hope my future will be better because there are people bugging me to study whenever I don't. But I still have work and sometimes I just feel like quitting. I'm all too stress now I can go berserk any time any moment. Handling situations and all, and worst of all I'm so accident-prone. I can cut myself without knowing and the next minute I can blood all over my fingers and hand. Slacked too much during sec 1 & 2 so now I've got to buck up. It still isn't too late, or is it?

    Wednesday, February 3, 2010

    They're still dying

    Saturday spent fruitfully.

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    The very first photo with him for the past 3 years!

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    That day was really fun and I felt awesome, though memories were where it seem to be placed at. We danced and run under the rain, eating the awesome sausage roll by Danial and spagetthi by Iffah, sitting and chit chatting, and for most of us were cam whores, so that explains the handful amount of pics, more in FB! I finally uploaded the photos cause most of them are expecting me to send it to them.

    School has been a real torture to me. Struggling so hard to catch up, I don't catch a thing in Maths/Physics/Chem/History/SS/DnT, almost everything you can say so. Sitting beside Jasper in Maths is super stress although he can help me but he makes me feel so dumb. And talking to Xi Hong for almost every lesson lightens up my feelings.

    Never did I feel so great in school for last month and today is such a nice date! I loved today and I hope that this feeling stay forever inside, although I'm still nursing everything I've broken. I'll be so pack this week but I love being busy, helps me keep my stress thoughts away. At least working can be fun with Hidayat - if he is doing cook side - talking to him and all. Pfft such a nice friend!

    Cheer up people, life's still great ahead.

    Thursday, January 28, 2010

    Click

    I miss all of you guys so freaking much:( Miss class chalet as well. Sighz when will we have the bond-ness again!



    Walao I think I really very fat already.
    &, how I miss everything so much. Perseverance is a very strong word, so is change.