our hearts like paper thin

i guess it's goodbye

2010-11-13T23:18:00.000+08:00

Finally moving off to another place. Many reasons why. I guess it's a brand new life there! I'll leave this place for some good ol' memories ;)

flushchasm.blogspot.com

Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life now
1) :D
2) :/

Day Ten: One confession
1) I am bisexual.

I kept my promise and finished the letters ;) Goodbye creamwithcrumbs, you've been a great place for me to rant. I'll definitely miss you.

Where were we hunny?

2010-11-11T18:10:00.000+08:00

Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot
1) You
2) How to improve myself
3) Us
4) The past
5) The future
6) *
7) *

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done
1) Quitting basketball
2) Getting together with
3) Didn't wanted to go overseas and study when I was p5
4) Making my life in this family eff up
5) Losing so many things and people who was dear to me
6) Change myself

Day Six: Five people who mean a lot
1) Leon
2) Kai Min
3) Grandpa
4) Ree
5) Natassha

Day Seven: Four turn offs
1) Armpit odor
2) Annoying
3) Bossy
4) Eff up

Day Eight: Three turn ons
1) Cute
2) Lovable
3) Sexyyy

Maybe we weren't what we thought we could be baby, maybe our forever doesn't exist, all those promises meant nothing, our souls and heart died where it shouldn't. I still love you no matter what happens, and this promise ain't gonna die until my heart for you does.

Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart

2010-11-06T22:07:00.000+08:00

Cravings for all this now... See why I need to change a camera? The flash is blocked by the lens :(

1) Sweet talker
2) Entertaining
3) Good fashion sense
4) Fun!
5) Caring
6) Super sweet towards me
7) Hang out a lot one-to-one :)
8) Just like Leon + (1) (5) (6) - some of the teasing

Oh how number 8 would be the best boyfriend in the world with a little of plus this and minus that x) Did I mention I wanna leave Singapore damn badly :((( I wanna see the world..... Just gotta save up money and go! Not gonna use much of mum's money.

I wanna be a red head soon!!! Sigh where did all my money go :(((( Decided I should just get my cam next year... AHHHH I'M IN A MESS NOW. ARGH. Had a hair cut and now it's so fugly, owell.

I'm spinning round and round, in whatever way I still go down.

Day Two: Nine things about yourself

2010-11-05T22:08:00.000+08:00

Shoes to die for

1) Fussy
2) Short-tempered
3) Spoilt brat - (As according to my boyfriend)
4) I like labels
5) Shy (No seriously I'm very shy among people I don't know)
6) Loud
7) I don't understand myself
8) Bitch
9) Weird

Time to be stronger than ever

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people

2010-11-04T20:45:00.001+08:00

@ 2:08am, getting ready for bed.

Hahaha with my pore strip on! Just so bored trying to keep awake to wait for L to finish Dota. Goodnight everyone! Sweet dreams! *Smooches*

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people
Day Two: Nine things about yourself
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot
Day Seven: Four turn offs
Day Eight: Three turn ons
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life now
Day Ten: One confession

Where did I go wrong? I'm sincerely apologize.

1) I'm sorry I'm a bad girl to you.

2) You're pretty just the way you are, no make-up, no nothing, most importantly, not fat.

3) Let's patch up shall we, I'm sorry I said those horrible things to you.

4) (Okay this is gonna be an angry one) You should just shut your fucking trap up and leave us alone, I don't actually really care whether you left my life or not because you don't even deserve me. Used to pity you that's why I even bothered to reply, but now, nah, you're just a waste of a big space in Singapore. You should know who you are. JSYK, I don't want you back in my life.

5) Thank you for screwing up my life in Anderson. I regretted.

6) I love you and you're not fat, you're just cute in your cheeks. Hehex

7) Screw you for making me to that state a few months back.

8) You disgust me very much, you're not cool, stop thinking that you are.

9) I miss you, very much.

10) The whole world will be so envious of us one day.

Ohhhh the horror I'm feeling right now again. I forgotten about classes again and I just slept past it. Haven't been back to school for any extra lessons nor submitting some stupid form. Have been working, should really save up some money to go overseas next year after my N's. Mind's in a whirl, feeling so aimless.

Come to think of it, I haven't been going out till late night. How I want to leave Singapore now.. Getting so sick of this, yet feeling a tinge of numbness, oh the irony. Blablabla I should just shoot myself in the eyeballs.

Just stay

2010-10-29T15:22:00.009+08:00

Am so bored now!! Heading off to church in a few hours time. Miss qt already!! :( He doesn't want me to study with him BOOORING.

Some brand fanatic hahaha

Hahahahahahahahha

Arts Fest day. So many things happened. I'm not in the mood of wanting to be sad, whiny and all but I just can't help it. To put it simply, maybe I just take things for granted, too much. But really, how far can you go when you're deeply overwhelmed by a fear that will never leave you.

I have no single plan for Halloween this year so I'm just gonna stay home and enjoy my bed. Someone please enlighten me on what am I suppose to do? To improve myself on being that person. Ohhh I'm feeling all shitty again, sorry boyfriend.

"You ever love somebody so much you can barely breathe. When you're with them, you meet and neither one of you even know what hit them. Got that warm fuzzy feeling yeah them chills, used to get them. So lost in the moments when you're in them. It's the rage that took over, it controls you both. So they say it's best to go your separate ways. Guess they don't know you. Cause today, that was yesterday, yesterday is over, it's a different day. Sounds like broken records play over. But you promised her, next time you'll show restraint. You don't get another chance, life is no Nintendo game. But you lied again, now you get to watch her leave, out of the window guess that's why they call it window pane. Now I know we said things, did things that we didn't mean. And we fall back into the same patterns, same routine. But your temper's just as bad as mine is, you're the same as me. But when it comes to love you're just as blinded. Baby please come back, it wasn't you baby it was me. Maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems. Maybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano. All I know is I love you too much, to walk away though. Come inside, pick up your bags off the sidewalk."

no more faith

2010-10-24T01:53:00.001+08:00

What we had and still having now is amazing. Meaning dearest.

Just me & you.

Never as pretty as her, never as good as giving advice as her, never perfect like her. Yet, I don't wanna be her.

Going through shits isn't very easy do you know that? I'm existing for nothing, living for no shit. I don't have my life anymore.

I think I'm fallin' for you

2010-10-22T22:20:00.002+08:00

I'm getting really lonely :( Stinky O levels snatching away my boyfriend from me, and screw the person who created armorgames.com/dota/blackshot/warcraft.

Wondering how my life would be for the next few years. It had been great for a while last time. I had everything. Like a mountain I guess, up you climb, down you fall. Results... same old thing. Wish to make a trip over to Bali or something... Let me relax for a while and let my shoulders down, please? :(

I wanna be exhausted, so I can sleep very very very easily. But then again, everything wears me off.

happy days

2010-10-18T22:25:00.002+08:00

Damn bored damn bored! Can't believe I'm actually missing school. Singapore's really so boring I've got to explore more places! Shall have a mini tour! Wanna go to places I haven't been to! Town is getting a little too boring. I wanna go to Marina Bay Sands, USS, and so many places all over again! Okay cut the crap bzzzz. School's tomorrow woohoo can't wait for the results.

Wanna buy so many many many shoes!!!!! Arghhhh

Disgracing myself on my own blog LOL

DAMN GOOD RUMBA CAKE

Major cravings for this Sultana Swirl right nowwww :(

I miss my CS4 so much :( The colours would be greater. Oh myyy need to move to a new place and get everything for my own soon. Need to dye my hair!! WE ARE YOUNG ONLY ONCE SO WHY NOT DO THINGS MORE DARINGLY. Any nice color to introduce anybody? :))) Shoes shoes I need so many shoes!!!

Steel ringzzz with engraved drawings.
$6!
Visit bonelights!! Spread the love yaw? :>

fwens 4evur

2010-10-15T00:42:00.001+08:00

Feels good to be accompanied by my babies! Having endless of fun, it's after exams, time to enjoy big ass. Am so tired so I think I'm gonna rest my weekends away and prepare for school. And all my savings have dried up, have to get money by hook or by crook! Pictures and pictures. Love @fauxflights @sexayfangzx @NarishaRee, dearest girls forever.

Lovin' her translucent BB!
Happy girls we are. She never fails to make me smile all the time. And today was crazy. My cramps was really killing me inside out yet she had all the patience. I love you baby!

I cannot blog when I'm PMSing, all the ramblings will come out so i guess i'll just end here.

2010-10-12T14:02:00.004+08:00

i want a best friend, who wouldn't mind me for anything. i wish to go shop with her, talk over the phone at late nights, and she would rush down late at night if i'm crying. she wouldn't mind me whining all the long, complaining everyday, and all she will do is just to hug me and tell me i'm beautiful. we would go to picnics, watch a movie, and if she have a boyfriend we can have a double date. she wouldn't mind me saying i want to have a piercing here and there, or wanting to get inked. we can go swimming together, she don't mind me in bikini and seeing my fats. we can have sleepovers every month and share the same bed. she can hear me whine all day telling her about my problems, and i hope she will not be upset when i'm in a bad mood. she'll always be first to notice something is wrong with me. we can go overseas together, have many many photoshoots together, and she would surprise me on any occasion. we can go baking, yoga classes together, her fending me whenever anyone's out there to bully me. we can tease each other all day and not get mad, or perhaps she can act dumb with me, doing embarrassing things in public. she wouldn't find me ugly in anyway, because to her im beautiful. we would gossip about people we dont like, but at the same time dont go overboard.

this type of friend, only exists in my mind.

byebye im heading out woohoo! EXAMS ARE OVER.

2010-10-12T03:47:00.000+08:00

How have your week been going! Exams will be gone and all this while of waiting for freedom is finally arriving in a day's time. The feeling is extraordinary especially when you're realizing that you've nothing more to stress for for the next, say, 1-2 months? Though I need a job kinda badly but this feeling of having tons of stress piled up a week before the exams is finally removed from the heavy heart.

I still have 2 more papers to go and yet I am blogging my time away because I can't fall asleep. Must be the amount of coffee I had in the afternoon. I've been so tired lately that I dread almost everything even stepping out of the house. Somedays I wish I can just stay in and do things happily but I don't think this will ever come true, not now perhaps.

My past few days have been really great and filled with enthusiasm. Everyday I wish that I can go through this once more, like how I did in the past, putting the flame of fear aside and just live on like this. It's just the consequences that we dread, not the process.

He has been a good boy recently studying real hard for O's, and I can't love him enough because he actually always can find time to have dinner with me anywhere despite him having to study almost 15hours a day. Yes idiot I love you.

Church on 10/10/10. Kai Min and I went to window shop around city plaza for slutty clothes HAHA.

Cannot stand this girl sia hahaha

Don't know whether it's me or is my hair really growing extremely fast? Hahaha. Unproductive studying date with them! Ooops but I love their company :) Okay now, D&T and History paper I'm gonna tear you aparttttt buahaha.

And you said you'd hug me and tell me I'm worth it.

New layout

2010-10-07T20:02:00.011+08:00

A new layout done.

Losing all my confidence in study, my mindset has changed into something that I shouldn't even think of. Maybe because I can go way too deep in hatred, thus life dislikes me so much. I'm constantly losing track of what I am doing. Every night I try to avoid and stay away from all my silly thoughts, but sometimes I realise that, this is reality, and yes I still have to go on.

I'm never occupied with work, I try to study, I get distracted, and worse is I only remember all for a day? The next minute after exam is over I'll immediately forget all about it. Really hate myself for screwing up so many subjects :( And here I am, blogging when I have Math paper tomorrow. I'm mathematically disabled, yups.

Busy me will be all fine after next week! I really need a good night sleep, I haven't been sleeping too well for the past few days. And always cooping myself up at home. I want to feel the world at my toes again! Everything is in a rush now.

Somedays I just feel my incompletion of a heavy heart, a pinch where it can hurt so bad. The words just don't fit in so well.

I do have times when I get really mad and I've had it right to the tip of my toes, I feel like I'm gonna explode anytime. I can be a bitch and throw a fit around. Owell trying to change here even Kai Ming says my attitude is much better HMPH.

随便啦，我快要放弃了。。。

Harrow Muffins. Thank you for taking your time into teaching and handling me even when you have your O's to worry about. We'll stick through everything together forever alright? You study damn hard. Remember okay, fight all the way. Love still abounds baby, even though you are teasing me every single day. Thank you and I love you - I am such a boyfriend girl sometimes.

1) Sticky
2) Messy laptop table
3) This year's valentines rose
4) Cute stuffed toys
5) Memories of Midnight - Super good book that I actually neglected Leon for it
6 & 7) Just being bored

I guess I'm just born with zero tolerance, no patience and an extremely stupid and childish brain. I think I'm such a big time asswipe when it comes to herrrr haha. Oh whatever let Karma hit me back then I really don't give a shit about my life anymore. I wanna move to the States!

Bonelights has been updated! Btw, I won't be completing the letter thing for now, I'll just save it in this post! :D

~~Letter 1 — Your Best Friend~~
~~Letter 2 — Your Crush~~
Letter 3 — Your parents
~~Letter 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative~~)
~~Letter 5 — Your dreams~~
Letter 6 — A stranger
Letter 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Letter 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Letter 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Letter 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Letter 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Letter 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Letter 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Letter 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Letter 15 — The person you miss the most
Letter 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
~~Letter 17 — Someone from your childhood~~
Letter 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Letter 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Letter 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
~~Letter 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression~~
Letter 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Letter 23 — The last person you kissed
Letter 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Letter 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Letter 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
~~Letter 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day~~
Letter 28 — Someone that changed your life
Letter 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Letter 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

stressgurl_95@hotmail.com

2010-10-03T01:58:00.001+08:00

So fricking lazy to study... Can i just flunk everything? :( Haven't been heading out these days....... After exams!! Please let exams be gone in a flash :(

Is it me or it's just that I feel like I've to split myself into so many parts when hanging out with different people. Like er, the Chinese group, the English group, the quiet one, the fun one? Whutttt is wrong with me! It seems that I can never be real. The only time when I'm real is when I'm in school and er especially with KaiMin and Summers? Okay wtv!

FORMSPRING ME PLEASE :(((((((

Pictures soon I promise! I just don't like to see my blog dying :(

Hugs for people who still reads this space :>

Finally fifteen

2010-09-27T00:34:00.000+08:00

Night picnic at Marina Barrage with the bestest group of close friends > Dinner at Clarke Quay with Summers > Church > Raya at Ree's

This year's birthday have been the best in my entire 15 year old dog life!! Have to thanks Kaimin John and Summers for tolerating a whiny bitch like me... Jared for breaching his probation timing and waiting with Jun Rui for 2hrs. Natasha and her boyfriend for waiting for an hour.. And those who came down from the cellgroup bringing me presents! Thanks to those who came to barrage especially for me. Very very touch indeed and i feel super appreciated :'>

Thank you Leon for yet again tolerating my nonsense. This birthday wouldn't be so superb without you. And for the dinner by the river, <3 I should have stay over at your place!! We can play like mad. Haahaha but o'well. That night was magical though, really! No matter HOW MUCH YOU PISS ME OFF ON A DAILY BASIS (LOL), I still cherish you that much. Yes la i was damn happy about the cake and it really tasted great!!! I'm sorry and i love you tub! I WANT MY CARD OKAY.

Headed down to church on my actual day and I really got a pleasant surprise from them! Another awesome tasty cake!! It was really good!! Thanks to mainly Sweeney. More but I can't rmbr who but really thanks a lot :)))) And Bee, I still want my card too!!!

Hi my girlfs!! I'm terribly sorry for leaving school without telling you guys. But I really love love love the box a lot!!! It's so pretty! :))) And all the fun times we had at Ree's place. DAMN AWESOME. I know we(Natassha&Ree) haven't been going out too much, outing soon after exams okay!! And our *winkwink* ;))) Love you all so much, thanks for always standing by my side.

Cannot help it la!! Laptop has broken down so a few pictures in a while won't hurt righttt? :)))

Exams are less than a weeks' time. I feel like giving up on myself. I don't even think I'll revise if Summers didn't push me to? Ohhhhh I can't give up now!:( All my efforts would be wasted. Just have to go all the way. Just 3 weeks baby!! Everything is gonna end well.

I have the best boyfriend, Kaimin, Natassha, Ree, Natty. All that i ever ask for.

Just that. I need to shop, v e r y v e r y v e r y b a d l y.

It's not fine at all

2010-09-23T19:29:00.002+08:00

Sick and tired of this life.

On some days, I just feel like working so damn hard, earn enough and leave this country and study else where. Without touching a single cent from my mother. Fuck everything.

I think.... No wait, every thing is really changing. People are so two-sided.

When it starts to rage

2010-09-21T12:35:00.001+08:00

So... If you've been following me on Twitter, my laptop is broken down again. One too many times. No pictures. Nonetheless I had a great birthday celebration. Thanks to those who came down to Barrage, L who celebrated with me on Saturday, church on Sunday, and Ree's house on Monday.

Fucking hate people who judge me, even worse judge me for my past. Who the fuck are you to say about me, to be so judgemental against me, freaks. Anything unhappy don't talk behind my back, don't act as if you're so great. Please, you're not humble, don't act that great. If you don't like me then just get the fuck off my life.

Seriously why must you compete with me in everything. Just study your own fucking notes, go to thru train, stop challenging others when you can't even solve your own problems.

Get away. Really, screw the fuck off.

I'm sure I'll be pretending just like I am tonight

2010-09-15T23:11:00.001+08:00

Do you ever come to days when you don't wanna do anything but just hide under your blanket and cry as hard as you can? The thought occurs to me, but I never had the courage to do that. To make myself feel better, tonight i can say it's pms. But I really doubt so. Sensitive is me.

I am always such a weakling.

Some days the tears just wanna come out on it's own. It's so tough pretending to be smiling every time you're unhappy. It just goes another clockwise direction, Life goes on.

It hurts so bad sometimes not having you here

2010-09-10T00:04:00.001+08:00

Wasting this holiday away.. Spending my nights at home and doing nothing. Just lying on bed thinking about so many things I want. A girl never gets contented. Gonna turn 15 in almost a week's time. Love how time flies this year!! Can't wait to start a brand new life all over again :> Get out of the shits that I'm in right now, and who knows, maybe better people will come by! A new day, today will be good for sure!

The best years of my life

2010-09-09T00:39:00.000+08:00

Happy 16th baby girl ! Hope you had a fun day with us, hehe all the cake bashing and crazy stuffs. Caught Huanted Changi, was really baddd. Was so tough to lure Ira away whilst Ree and I planned to make the cake. Waited for them to like find their way to meet us for like er 20 mins LOL

Reeca was so high that day. Hmmmmmmm so fun. Have been really sleepy and draggy these days because I'm all so tied up! Ever since Comex I haven't had enough sleep. Ohhh how I love meeting new people but at the same time I just wanna keep to this size of social circle.

Ooooh look at my eyebags :( AND THE FUGLY PIMPLE THAT HAS BEEN STAYING THERE FOR ALMOST A MONTH ALREADY. DAMN ANNOYING. Okay abrupt ending bye!

Sounds like broken records playing over

2010-09-01T03:11:00.000+08:00

Impromptu decision Sentosa on a Monday night!! The atmosphere was really great and there were nobody around! And so we just lay on the mat, gazed at the tiny amount of stars, played psp and so on... The night view there was pretty, and we got to enjoy fireworks from Songs of the Sea. Would die to do this ever again with him.

He can be such an asshole at times (LOL), being mean and ALWAYS disturbing me. But nonetheless, despite the little things he do that ought to piss me off A LOT, I still can bear with everything and continue loving him. YA LA SOUNDS SO CORNY but he's really a sweetheart, sometimes la... Sorry I know you'll be reading this and I don't want your ego to increase LOL. Our 3rd is in a day's time and I'm really sorry I can't celebrate with you. Let's wait till your O's are over and we can do whatever we want to! :)))

And teacher's day celebration! Supposed to head to SAM with Bee & co but last minute I decided to bake cookies with Summers and 'em. And sad to say, my cookie failed epic-ly :( It's okay! People make mistakes.

P/S: ANYBODY WANNA GO TO YOGA CLASSES WITH ME? :(

Summers said I slim down... Hmm but he said I was fat too. HOW. LOL.

My source of motivation to slim down! Nadya is drop dead gorgeous!!! Time to be like that too! Hehehehx.

They're really good!

Let's go all the way tonight, no regrets, just love

2010-08-30T01:42:00.000+08:00

They never fail to make me smile :))) Rest of the photos another time. Kaiming please create a fb account I'm so lazy to post so many photos here ):

all we ever did was move around
i was always the new kid, never the cool kid
but all i ever wanted to do was to fall in love
just to be in love

but my heart was racing
my mind was screaming
you've got your whole life to do these things
but my legs were shaking
my hands were searching for her in the backseat of my car
i just lost it
and i can't believe it

i knew i was only sixteen
but i thought i loved her and it'd last forever
but only if i knew that she wasn't true
how could she do this to me?

#17)

2010-08-28T14:54:00.001+08:00

Letter to - someone from your childhood

Dear girls,

I miss you girls so much, it has been almost 2 years since we met up and I miss you guys so much. Time for some ketchup no!! I'd wanna meet you guys so soon <3 And I miss the days when we'd do stupid stuffs in school, take neoprints, share our drinks in the paper cup, eating curry mee and our favorite nasi lemak from the malay stall! Yes I still remember ^^ And we use to go to 7 11 near the school before remedials! And our favourite teacher Mr Anuar and Muz!! And BULLDOG (Hahaha) Times when we used to quarrel, give hugs, cheer each other up.. I still remember. We should really really see each other soon. And I wanna let you guys know that I treasure you a lot, each and every single one of you. Shanice Ang, Debby Thong, Lee Ziying, Aquila Deanna, Trena Wah ♥

With lotsa ♥♥♥,
Claire.

-

Such a soothing song ahhhh ~

Baby, I love you
I never want to let you go
The more I think about,
The more I want to let you know:
That everything you do,
Is super fucking cute
And I can't stand it

I've been searching for
A girl that's just like you
Cause I know
That your heart is true

Let's forget,
And run away
To sail the ocean blue
Then you'll know,
That my heart is true

You, you got me where you want me
Cause I'll do anything to please you
Just to make it through
Another year

You, I saw you across the room
And I knew that this is gonna
Blossom into something beautiful.
You're beautiful.

deep silence of eternity

2010-08-23T20:46:00.000+08:00

It's so tough to blog like before once you found out so many people that you don't expect to come by this place actually do read your posts.

Hard time trying to accept reality. I hate how I treat things lightheartedly, or maybe in another term "I don't care". It's not actually that I don't care, I do, deep down, I really do, just that, I'm a person who never shows my emotions. I can never express myself by a wide margin, causing many people to mistake me for who I am not. Or I'd sometimes wish for the simplest things, and I can make things topsy-turvy just by thinking a little too much. Yes, I do spend too much time in my head. The next minute after I talk to you, I can just stare into space and think, about the littlest and most random things people say. I always thought that there's some hidden agenda. It is always me, has been always me, I'm just too sensitive in a way... Not in terms of feelings but words. There are days when I wish I can just care a little more about how I am feeling. My emotions always clashes. I can't remember when I was sad, I only retrospect when I was unhappy. And the last time I was really smiling through my heart, I have no idea when too. I don't know what my brain stores, it seems empty yet there are always things happening inside of it. It's like a whole new me.

Everyday I wake up in hoping there's something in stored for me. But it's just that glimpse of hope in the morning, after every 7.30am, I realise things are still the same. Daily routines, sick of studying already. I wonder how many more stuffs they can come up for us. It really sucks to have insomnia every now and then. My body is so screwed I cannot do things that I like to. IDK, I need a life, I need the bubbly me again. Crap it's only 8.45.

You may think I've no problems blablabla, but my family is just so fucking screwed. Pray I'll be able to move again? Uncle I miss you a lot come back to Sg soon I need you :(

Take care everyone, I'm falling sick too xxx

How do I get better once I've had the best?

2010-08-22T23:58:00.000+08:00

First things first! BONELIGHTS IS UPDATED. Share some love alright!!

Fruitful Saturday with favourite girls and Summers.

Feels so good to be loved by the closests <3

<3
What I need in my life,

Everything inside never comes out right

2010-08-19T00:31:00.000+08:00

So union jack-y!!

Ol' classic but I'm still lovin' it.......

I wouldn't mind wearing this shuz out lor...

First on my list:

So pretty....... Time to get a new wallet!! :) TIME TO SAVE MONEY FOR THIS PRETTY SHIT. Or should I just get the cute River Island one...... Chanel is so awesome I wish I had the money to buy everything. Okay just being materialistic la, c'mon dream big! Any kind rich souls out there willing to help me buy oneee?

*Coughs*.......my birthday...*coughs*...is..*coughs*......nearing...

Actually my emotion is mixed up like shit but I just viewed all these to make me feel better. Oh well. Sorry to Twitter followers, unfollow me if you hate spam updates/emo shits.

Pix credits to Chanel

Like before, silly me

2010-08-18T17:21:00.001+08:00

Oh I had a lot to say was thinking on my time away
I missed you and things weren't the same

Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry it makes me want to die

I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you
And I know I can't take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry:

This time I think I'm to blame it's harder to get through the days
You get older and blame turns to shame

Every single day I think about how we came all this way
The sleepless nights and the tears you cried it's never too late to make it right
Oh yeah sorry

S.O.S

2010-08-17T19:39:00.003+08:00

HARLOW. I abandoned bonelights@tumblr it moved to bonelights@blogspot. Yes yes too fickle minded but I'm sticking there for now! :)) Anybardiii wanna buy my high-waist jeans? :( Fourskin, tagged size 27. EMAIL BONELIGHTS@HOTMAIL.COM

BYEBYE HAVE A GREAT DAY. Smooch.

Let me back into your arms

2010-08-15T23:28:00.000+08:00

Church on Saturday, it really isn't that back come to think of it ;) I wouldn't mind going again hehe. We went to shoot some Zombies after that!! :DD I wanna do it again so fun omg who wanna go Lan hehehhehe.

There's this feeling in me that I always feel lethargic. Why. PMSing like a total bitch. ARGHHHHHHHHH. Hate being a girl :( I feel like damn vulgar and down whenever I PMS er wtf? Ya la all the emo shit coming in already I hate being in this state even though it's the only time to let me think and reflect.

I want so many things!! A girl never gets satisfied. Tomorrow is gna be a diet day. Cannot stand being so flabby :(((( DIET STARTS TOMORROW. But then again, my tomorrow is forever. OH WELL. I WANNA DIE ALREADY. BYE. Sux2bme :(( Really.

Random + bored

2010-08-12T21:24:00.000+08:00

I know la I'm one bimbo but I'm really bored!! But it's really fun so I'll do more again hehehehehehehex. I'M A XIAO CAM WHORE. Still got more but... I think I'll just post it during another day if not your eyes will hurt LOL.

SIAN TO THE CORE. SUMMERS/KAIMIN/JOHN ALL SICK WTF WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO. ZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Everyday my confusion grows

2010-08-12T02:50:00.000+08:00

My baby laptop is back with me! Btw, time check again! 2.30am I guess my biological clock is partially screwed? School after a long weekend wasn't good. Let's just get over this year and be done with it. Another what-a-day tomorrow.... On a brighter note the weekends are nearing again. Which means, more studying to prepare for final year exams?

Peektures to let this blog more lively ~ :)

The color is so pretty!

Was a tiring night that day. Everyone was drained out and almost died of fatigue. Fun and interesting though :>

Another day of "job hunting", partial plan was to just lure the boys out. LOL

KM: SO CUTEEEEE.

Sums up my totally great weekend ;) Having the best company and what more can you ask for!

Have GOT TO find myself a job and start working :S

Am soooo determined to slim down and grow taller but i just have no idea where to start :( I've been working out everyday and my abs are forming :S OH WELL.

An unearthly timing to have cravings for cheese fries and Espresso. Restrained myself from taking in ice coffee if not I wouldn't be able to sleep a wink! Can follow me up on Twitter to see what am I up to, I update it like uhm, spamming it. Hehex.

Remember I said I've gotta start loving myself more. And I rly do!! I'm falling in love with my bunny teeth I find them so adorable!

Dreamcather Summers got me. Hehehhehe.

Even though it's a small one but I love it to bits and pieces!! (!!) And after I move to a new place I would get myself another big one and maybe a collection full of 'em! I love it so much and hope it can prevent nightmares from approaching me. And after I move out I want a petttt! Kitten or pup? :)))) It'd be so lovely to have a companion no?

YUELING IF YOU READ THIS, I WANNA HAVE OUTING #2 SOON ALRIGHT!

Just go with the flow ~~ TIME TO UPDATE MY WARDROBE :(

#27)

2010-08-11T01:40:00.001+08:00

Letter 27 - To the friendliest person you only known for a day

Dear Sean Yee,

Hello father! Haven't seen you in almost a year already. And come to think of it I've only met up with you once right!! Hahaha pretty cool cuz we met online! :) I remember how we used to talk and I can actually confide into you for so many stuffs, you'd just be there to comfort me, we can just chat for hours in the wee morning ~ if everything was still so great.... I really miss you and hope I can see you soon ;)))

With lotsa luvs,
Your "daughter", Claire.

Everytime I see you falling I get down on my knees and pray

2010-08-11T01:33:00.001+08:00

As you can see... My laptop's not back yet!! Been a long time I know and I miss it a lot! :'( oh well! Anyhowz, time check: 1:25am, I've school and I'm not asleep! Must be the coffee I drank... Today I'm in a really good mood! Don't know why but it feels pretty good to be like that :)

Been way too long since I've felt this way. Starting to feel more confident of myself, gta start loving and treasuring what I have now. Regretted way too many times and I wldnt let anything slip out of my hands ever again. Learnt that I have to change in order to see things more openly and not get really bothered abt tiny stuffs.

Have to admit that life has been going on well and smoothly even though I can go megrim sometimes but summing up it was greatt :) times that I wished for again.. Having fun, being simple and just chillin' out! Even solitary moments work out well, so I believe that things perpetually will go on in a good way. No more hindering and just go for it, but your brain has to be incisive and make wise decisions alright.

It's amazing how someone can turnover your life without omission. Painstakingly built up everything and I'm never letting it down nor giving it up easily :)

Determined to start anew and become a whole new person :)) well, I'd love to make more friends too ;)))) have to start socializing if not I'm really a loner LOL

My name is Claire, a month more till I'm 15, how about you? ;)

loseric life #1

2010-08-02T23:47:00.001+08:00

HARROW EVERYBODY. My laptop died again so I'm not posting much! CAs are around the corner so pull up your socks and start mugging okay! I'm trying to, and am gonna rot at home just to study 8) no more fooling around. Oh wellz! Anywayyyy mom said we're heading to Phuket durinf end of Nov! Heheheheheheh GETAWAY FROM SGP YAYNESS.

Okay bye will update this space soon!

Don't let the sun go down with anger around

2010-07-26T01:30:00.002+08:00

Saturday, I manage to spend my day out with the ones I enjoy being with. I went to church as well! Everything was amazing and didn't turn out to be that bad as I expected.

Arthur left SG already :( OH WELLZ.

That maniac would have spend shit on Zara if Wei Long & I didn't stop him! Hahah

Bee's epic face HAHA

"FASTER!!! HEAVY!!"(HAVE TO SHED SOME WEIGHT TERRIBLY)

It's 1am and having school tomorrow. Pray hard I won't have Monday Blues else my days ahead isn't gonna be any where near good :(

I really don't like hearing to soft and sentimental songs at this hour but I can't help it! It makes me think and think and think, but after all the thinking, I still don't understand, I get hurt more, I feel more unhappy. It's just me I hope.

"I think I'll start a new life,

I think I'll start it over,

where no one knows my name.

I think that I'm just tired,

I think I need a new town,

to leave this all behind."

My self-esteem is going downhill like vroomz. Why oh why :( Need to regain back my confidence! Shall start by toning myself.

Jessica Stam is one goddess man! She officially becomes #1 in place of Audrey Hepburn and Twiggy! Her leg is to die for! O'welllll ~

I hope I'll wake up tomorrow miraculously losing about 3-4kg? :))) That'll be the best present evurrr! Hmm... Not a massive update but in order to let this oh so boring place a revival with some pictures.... 'Ve ta do this.

Must start planning my stuffs already, in order to make everything successful ;)

No one ever knows what's going on inside becuz I never let anyone that deep in

(Tell me about it)

Well shall not get my eyes hooked to this page already, ciaoz!

Need a new town to leave these all behind

2010-07-22T19:50:00.004+08:00

I want my dreamcatcher :( And P/S: I hate birthdays.

How does the new facelift look? School has been the same, daily routine. Arthur's flying off soon :( Another 3 months till we meet I guess. I'm lost for all words these few days, 've no idea why. One too many obstacles I've pass through, am gonna make the best out of this one life I have.

Having a thought of changing my dream to another. Hmm... Decisions once again. Fucking hate it. Don't wanna go too deep into it though, ciaoz.

FORMSPRING ME PLEASE, I'M BORED TO TEARS :(

Help me with bonelights too! x)

Okay fo' real now, CIAOZ.

#4)

2010-07-22T13:43:00.000+08:00

Letter to - your sibling

Dear Cordell,

I really hate you a lot. Thanks for destroying my life ever since the day you were born :) Although you're nice sometimes, but most of the time you've no respect for me nor the family. Learn to live mature and grow up well, I really want to wash my hands off you already. You're simply not for me to care. Fuck off from my life someday.

With love and hate,
your Sister.

Assumptions allow the best things in life to pass you by

2010-07-18T00:53:00.001+08:00

Found some old photos!!

I spent yesterday and today fruitfully! Met up with Arthur, WeiLong, Adeline and CherBeng yesterday for some awesome dinner. Some catching up after that and it was all good! Lousy quality sorry I didn't bring my camera out :(

And today a happy cum a little bit out of mood girl met Summers! We finally had dinner together after ages. Oh well, wait till his O's are over everything will be better I guess! :)

My little Summers takes hours to do up his hair. HAHA vainpot!! Tsk I still love you so much.

#2)

2010-07-14T23:28:00.002+08:00

Letter to - your Crush

I'm writing this in status of the period when I didn't have a boyfriend.

Dear EyeCandy,

When things were in control, it felt bad. Then it started to get a little out of hand. Well it felt good "stalking" you, raving about you to my friends and how cute I think you were. You were purely my EC, nothing else. And feelings just grew. A lot. I had no idea why but I couldn't stand myself. It was really fun seeing you almost everywhere, and that 30mins of school (recess) really made my day. I can just stare at you without you noticing. Even my friends think I'm crazy over you (TSK). It's just the chemistry that was there! I really liked it, the thoughts about you was like a running tap. We have so many things in common. Everything improved day by day and tada! I'm a happy keed being with you now :D P/S: I love going gaga over you! :P

With Luv,
MiMi.

#5)

2010-07-13T19:51:00.002+08:00

Letter 5 - to your Dreams

Hello my dreams. You make my life so perplexing till the extent that sometimes I feel like giving up on you. I get so fucked up because of you, I think and think and you're in my mind all day long. I wanna chase after you so much, but I don't know where to start. Whats more SGP is such a rambling city. I don't know what choice I've made, but I really hope I don't regret it. I really think about you all the time, getting mad and the feeling of it is just so... depressing. Well I don't know whether I can accomplish it, however I'll try. It'snoteasy, I just have to put in my all. Give me a glimpse of hope, will you?

With Luv,
The One who wants you so much

----------------------

Have to change. Sadness is taking over my fragile heart. And I want a dreamcatcher so badly.

#21)

2010-07-12T03:02:00.002+08:00

Life has been a total bitch to me these few days. As the saying goes, Life is full of ups and downs. Have to disagree much. Been almost a total down for me for the past 14+ years. Maybe just that tiny weeny bit times that I was happy. Really have no idea what am I living for. Not for my parents no. But for that few people around me that keeps me going on. Sighz.

Although the sadness drowns me most of the time but aiya, I don't give a flying fuck already. Have to move on and face reality with guts!!

On a lighter note, Arthur's back!!:)

Saturday I finally met up with my gurlz after not going out for ages! And I dragged Kai Min along too ;)

As usual, cam whores chit chatting. Short but great time with them.

I met up with Summers thereafter. Caught Despicable Me, Agnes is so adorable!!! Must watch! Summers finally took photos with me!! Reluctantly la... But heck!! Hehe he's always such a cutie. Muah. I love you sugarrr ;)

At least he's making my life happy :)

Letter 21 - to Someone you judged by their first impression

Dear Kaylie Delma,

Hello ti bu! I used to think that you are an ah lian because of the way you dress up and look. HAHA. Guess you have to perk yourself up to impress me (hmph) HAHA kidding. Well, I didn't really expect to be friends with you though, cause, our friends are different, we are like, total strangers. Hmm... Just so you know, I'm really lucky to know you, well we are on the same boat (winks) and yeah, been through hell lotsa crazy laughs with you. And you're always there for me to let me rant on, and give me a hug whenever I need it. Also not forgetting the "awesome" liang cha you brewed for me. I was kidding lor, and you actually did x) Xiexie! Don't be so unhappy always, you can shoot anything when you're with me! :) And it's cool to know that we have things in common. (We fuck our mums LOL), we talk A LOT, we complain about being fat, and so very much I love you my Da Jie! HEH. Though I'm not that good in giving advices, but still.... You know what I mean. It's not long since I really knew you, and I should be kinda lucky to be friends with you no? :) Hahaha. You're the only person who can get high and laugh with me so much lor. MUACKMUACKMUACK. Ich Liebe Dich Xiao Hei/Ti Bu/Woman/Loser/Da Jie!

With Luv,
Xiao Bai/Woman/Xiao Mei

#1)

2010-07-07T23:49:00.001+08:00

Letter 1 - to your Bestfriend

I don't have a best friend exactly, close friends I must say. But there's this girl who'll always be with me no matter what.

Dear Natasha,

Hello Sunshine! Although we're not that close with each other anymore, but I really have to thank you for always being by my side when I needed someone to talk to the most. No matter what time of the day I can call you, I can text you, and you'll always be there to give me a hug, to comfort me, share my pain. We can tell each other our deepest secrets. I love being with you because you always have that smile on your face that brightens up my day. It's hard for us to communicate since you have your clique and I have mine, but please know that I'll always be there for you like how you're always for me. I appreciate those little things that you've done. We shall go out someday okay, I miss hanging out with you so much. And just pouring out my feelings. Thanks for always being the listening ear although I know that you have a lot of problems. I love you hun, take good care of yourself :)

With Luv,
Claire.

I might break your heart

2010-07-06T01:39:00.002+08:00

THIS WATCH IS RETAILING @ IMM SHOPPING MALL BUT I THINK I BOUGHT THE LAST ONE AWAY. I NEED 2 OF IT, AM WILLING TO PAY FOR <$22 EACH. (RETAILED AT $20)

Hmm, just a random post about the watch but yeah, a new skin, inspirations from Denise :)

School's in tomorrow yet I'm not turning in yet. Sigh I wish there was no school :( Or go as of when I like. I don't think this is the right updates for a blog but yeah. Follow me on Twitter to view regular updates ;)

Bonelights updated, not a couple of stuff, just one but yeah, I don't have the time.

Shall study already.

Bye.

Ask me anything on Formspring!!

Her heart is fragile

2010-07-02T23:06:00.000+08:00

Happy 1st month hun. (Don't kill me when you see this photo)

I love you xxx

I'm still alive but barely breathing

2010-06-30T01:58:00.007+08:00

I FEEL REALLY DAMN AWESOME TO TOUCH MY LAPTOP AGAIN AND BLOG!!

And anyway, school has started, so how's life peepz!

Studying has been pretty boring, have to start mugging real hard already, 8-) Shall begin to read more books again to find means and ways to improve my English (x.x) Sorry, feeble-minded kid here.

Overdue photos, Sentosa outing during the holidays. Though it was kinda fail but nonetheless it was great, as I said, the company's all that matters :)

Photo shouts all,shed some weight bitch! Sometimes I can really go @.@ sigh. Never mind. Life will stink in a way or two. It's still boring though. Hmm, where should I go on Saturday? Should I attend church on Sunday? And where should I wander around on Monday? LOL. Pfft I shall just rot and stink.

I really hate it when I'm just not in the mood to talk to anyone, and people comes up to you and keep pestering you, asking you are you alright or bla. I can feel my blood boiling and just wanting to scream in their face, "I'M NOT EMO, I'M DOING SOME THINKING" Seriously how far can these people get.

But sometimes, just sometimes. I really feel like breaking down, but what for? I like being sad though, weird me. Just have to plaster a fake smile everywhere I go.

Sidetrack, I really miss camp. Trouble-free days. A good ol' 4 days. Shall get out of SGP soon....... *MUMMYYYY*

Is it me or is it the weather, that I think I've grown weaker. Splitting headaches, breathing problems, chest aches, stomach aches, er.... (me?) Argh, abhor how weak my immune system is.

I suspect that I'm getting uglier and fatter as the days go by. Having too low self-esteem nowadays. When time goes by, things will change. Have to wait still no matter long or short. I feel like deleting this blog away and start a whole new life :-( I can't bear to though. I will, but not now. Soon.

Pills pills I need pills! Time check: 3:41am, have to get up for school, what a chore.

Time to burn my books muahhahaha.

P/S: I hope the 'facelift' looks fine, wanted something clean and managable, I'm a light person (Y)

Further from you

2010-06-28T15:26:00.001+08:00

Because NO one ever understands, at all.

Everything's closer to the end but, I'll get further from you.

Whirlwind

2010-06-26T23:34:00.000+08:00

I've no Internet at home nao and I've lots of photos to blog with, so lesser updates on my blog with, but I'll try my best to blog more often brrr. Anyway, this holiday has been pretty fruitful and i've been really happy for the past 3 weeks but th last week is really problematic so yeah....

Haven't touch any of my homeworks and I'm left with like 1 day till school reopens so guess I'm dead. Really can kill me at this moment :( oh well life's pretty sucky nowadays so too bad. Bye earthlings I'll be back soon :D

I don't need a parachute

2010-06-17T22:03:00.003+08:00

Wednesday was spent with Yue Ling and Summers! Pretty awesome to sum up.

From the jokes and being crazy. Changing to heels then flats then being a 10cent-thrift-loser, was pretty awesome :)

School's starting. I feel tired easily this few days. Biological clock having problems again. Hope Arthur comes back faster and pass me some pills ):

Feeling like an elephant, a very lazy and fat one.

DEPRESSING I TELL YA.

HOOHHO

2010-06-16T01:37:00.002+08:00

I love ma ego keed.

Leon Summers xxx

You're not gonna break me

2010-06-12T03:57:00.000+08:00

Am really bored here so decided to post something. Just to kill my time and kill your eyes :D Anyhowz these 10 shots were taken within an hour due to boredom-ness while waiting for Mr Summers.

I feel really screwed these few days. Well basically I feel horrible. My low-esteem thingy is back into me. Feel so damn bloody inferior when I'm surrounded by pretty and slim girls :( I know, most girls do, but, WHY. Why do I have to be born with such ugly face. PIMPLES ARE OUTRAGINGGGG!

Though, Life have been pretty great and fair towards me. At least for now, better than nothing no! Anyway, I'M WAITING FOR MUM TO REPLY SO I CAN GET MY MACS. I know, super fattening but I'm really hungry ): Sigh. There goes my dream of being skinny again huh. That sucks.

I've been spending life fruitfully by waking up late and ending my day fast cause I really have nothing to do. I haven't touch any of my holiday assignments yet.... Chinese, Chem, SS, English, Math BLABLABLA. So many things to do, so little time!

I know this is extremely boring but yeah, I had to take pics while waiting for Mr Summers. He's actually the first guy I'm head over heels for. (Think someone's proud eh) HAHA. Hmm. Everything's going on smoothly I guess. Let's just wish for the best, everything will still maintain this way for a lifetime. Prolly not but, close to it will be good enough! :)

Things are going fine between mum and I as well, and I love her more than ever. (inserts hearts to the infinite) HEY! I'm going to shift apartment soon again! Happy happy heheheh. Life at this home just sucks, you won't know until you try.

Feeling kinda insecure with many things right now. But thanks to Wei Long for clearing much of my doubts and making me feel better. Least of being insecure.

OH YEAH, I got 'flashed' via webcam today. Long story ohh. That mofo, MAY KARMA GET YOU. Like really. Fuck you so hard till your whole family dies. I'm insulting your mum your dad and your forest. GET A LIFE :)

Summers went, 'Why are you doing the: Hello, I woke up 0.1sec ago thing' DO I LOOK LIKE THAT? LOL. Life's pretty awesome now for me, no school and all. Though my friends & I are drifting apart somehow, but I need you guys to know there, I'll always be that same girl who's always willing to go to the extra mile to help! (L)

Second last paragraph of words... I'm getting really sleepy ): Keep yawning, but am preparing to webcam with Summerz! :) :) :) Hehz I'm a happy girl when it comes to him and my girlfs!! :) I luvz you all PLEASE STAY WITH ME (L)

LET'S ALL BE HAPPY ♥♥♥

P/S: I love Kaylie Delma

Was never my intention

2010-06-10T23:59:00.000+08:00

Just being harpieeee

Even the stars refuse to shine

2010-06-10T03:34:00.001+08:00

CAMP was awesomez :))) It didn't turn out to be that bad, or maybe because Sec 3 camp made an impression of camps being bad hehe. Well, I miss sleeping under the freezing air-con with Kai Min, I miss running about, I miss people calling me Miley, I miss every part about camp even the bathing :( *I want to bathe ~* (Inside joke) Hahaha

Kinda expanded my social circle and hey, many peepz didn't turn out to be that stuck up as well (._.)

A day after camp, was suppose to head to Sentosa but failed cause it was raining. Nonetheless we had fun! Watched The Killers, (P/S: HOT HOT ASHTON KUTCHER)

Malcolm's epic face of: "HOW DO YOU DO THIS?!"

I thought it would be disastrous but no :D Had much fun with the company :)

Anyhowz, talking to the cheem cheem Wei Long really make the gears of vocabulary in my brain turn HAHA. Hmm, shall let him try to clear my mind that's in doubts :)

Life revolves around changes, points of view, and thinking.

Dangz. I'm not asleep and I've to wake up at 9 tmrw ):

WHATEVER LIFE, WHATEVER

Crazy life

2010-06-01T23:54:00.000+08:00

Should I be happy or sad, I gain a love one, I lost an important one.

Fuck is this. Don't screw up my life please. Damn. June is just starting. Like puh-lease? :(

Oh well idk

I'm a happy girl

2010-06-01T03:13:00.001+08:00

Time check: 2.53am. I ought to be up at 6.30am tomorrow. MY MAID'S NOT HERE WITH ME :( I can die. Fuck. I'm fucking pampered I know.

Anyhow, last few days were great. Outing with girls and clonie.

Remedial tmrw remedial tmrw remedial tmrw. Intend to fall asleep during lessons HAHA. It's June! (Happy happy)

Sometimes I find myself so ironic in terms of the attitude towards life. I can tell others to live on happily but what about myself, sigh!

Oh well, I really don't know what to do any more, so let's just go with the flow. Life's still great no matter what.

Who needs others when you've friends like these ♥♥♥

I'll be heading for camp soon. SIGH x10000

Lights out. Goodnight, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite.

No time can heal

2010-05-30T00:04:00.000+08:00

One fine day,

I'll disappear.

I'm the cause, I'm the solution.

Call the surgeon, mend the pieces

Mend the pieces

2010-05-26T22:40:00.000+08:00

Hi, I don't know how am I feeling right now.

Mixed emotions.

Fall outta my head

2010-05-24T04:16:00.001+08:00

This weekend was spent fruitfully, perhaps one of the best this year.

Although it's kinda depressing that I'm getting fatter, but it's okay, I'm slimming down soon. Hehz.

Anyhow, Saturday I met up with the usuals and went to pit buliting(hehe). @sexayfangzx Babe I know how you feel, so we'll be a brand new person after the June hols okay? :) I love you and don't drag your self-esteem down. LJS has aways been our best place, and the usual Esplanade.

Life's good with them no matter where.

I made a new friend call KittyC. He made me have not enough of sleep. HAHA. We went to have dinner @ Suki Sushi after I left my girls. We spammed 3 plates of Salmon and the tables surrounding us were like O.O We walked from Somerset>Cine>Ion>Somerset>Dhoby>CityHall. WALKED. Yeah we were awesome :) HAHA. Well, at least it felt good because we talked about lots of things. We star gazed and the sky was filled almost with stars.

And today, I replenished my sleep :) Met up with Kitty again, Jap food for dindin again hehz. Tried to find some stars but nah, it was bullshit. So, I have a new 'best' friend now LOL.

Claire, why are you such a coward.

Hope Monday don't keel me. Time check: 4:14am. I ought to be asleep. But I miss the past too much, perhaps only Ryan Keith and Xi Hong will understand how I feel.

And to you guys, don't be a slutbag, anything you can just say it in my face. Don't push the blame to other people.

'Nuff said.

Thanks for the weekend @sexayfangzx, @ReeZarrahaha and Kitty!

BYE

i screwed up

2010-05-21T01:35:00.000+08:00

Hi. I've got too many problems. These days are worst than exam times.

No one has a life like mine, so nobody would understand.

Things are getting pretty screwed, especially from bad to worse. I feel like typing so much out, but I don't know where to start. And it's obviously quite private.

I'm only 15, 14 to be exact. Which person will let you take advantage of, getting bullied, used, but just shut her mouth up, because she just wanted the best for everyone?

It sounds like a typical sacrifice, but nobody has no fucking idea what they done. Cannot stand it at all. Hypocritical pricks.

Mum pop up a question today.

'So you going overseas to study?'

How, how life, how. What the hell do you want me to do. I always have to make choices, between this between that. I'm getting quite sick of life already. I swear this is one of the worst stages in my life. Life lesson learnt: Claire, please be more observant when making friends. Don't make those who will use you, gossip about you.

I've no more ideas how to hold on to my life anymore. Don't even know why am I living in this shit place.

Keel me. Life would be so damn much more better.

'Scars remain for a better future'

2010-05-20T23:10:00.002+08:00

Via tumblr.

I'm not even 15. This sucks, doesn't it.

Till the night's dry

2010-05-17T22:49:00.001+08:00

Plain boring weekend spent by working. Yesterday was great though, Natassha came by and we slacked around :)

Just to release some boredom.

Today I skipped school. And I swear I wasn't bored at home. Watched movies, ate, sleep. I felt like a happy pig. Okay everybody chin up. Nothing can go in your way, make it happen.

Random night

2010-05-13T22:33:00.000+08:00

I know this is sooooo random, but I just wanna blog! Hohoho. Finally a change of layout, it's very plain and uncr8tive tho, but it's okay! :)

I'm happy, not in terms of inner self because I'm still very stressed, but yeah, some people around me are just purely awesome. They never fail to make my day no matter what :) Xx

Anyhowz,

just some self-plugging done.

bonelights@tumblr - Please fund the broke!
bonelights@formspring - Created out of boredom and I've decided to let you readers (if there's any) to just comment at formspring :) I'll just leave the bg there just like that tho, hahah. JUST FEEL FWEE TO ASK.

I wanna be happy ~ SIGH

Truth is a Stranger

2010-05-11T23:01:00.004+08:00

BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR

Last week's photos. I hate my life so much now, I miss my past.

How I wish I could drown myself with thousands of pills together with beer, sleep it away, everybody would feel better anyway.

BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR

2010-05-11T00:25:00.000+08:00

HI PEEPZ, PLEASE HELP ME IN CLEARING MY WARDROBE!

BONELIGHTS@TUMBLR

Really in need of cash now, sooo... if you were to lend a helping hand, it'd be great x) Will be updating more soon! And rmbr to click the 'Next' button for more items! THANKS!

Happy Mum's Day

2010-05-09T22:08:00.000+08:00

Hey mum, I don't think you'll be reading this but... Happy Mother's Day :)

I know I've always been bad at expressing myself to you, so I can't speak properly when I'm with you. It'll probably take you ages to find this out. But, thanks for always being there to support me, being there for me secretly. Although we do quarrel a lot whenever we get real pissed, but I still wanna say I'm sorry for whatever I've done to hurt you real deeply, sorry for making you worry for no reason, sorry for flaring up at you whenever I had a bad day, sorry for making you get angry at me and me being rude and ill-mannered to you. And, SORRY for not getting you ANYTHING today. I still love you :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I've yet to post last week's outing photos ~~ Pure laziness. Tryna get those shit up to facebook. FUCK YOU FACEBOOK.

Okay bye world, I shall turn off the lights and get a good rest x) There's Math tmrw! FATED TO FAIL IT :D

Longing for the breeze

2010-05-02T07:38:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling crappish again. Been so long since I woke up so early during a weekend. But I still prefer my old life. I'm sitting alone at the back of the house, wishing to get a tan later on or something. Anyway, ytd was not really that good with them but I love h2h talks at night. Especially under the blank sky but with twinkling stars. Even though it makes me feel sad.. But, who feels happy under such places. With your favourite people around you, there's things you can pour out to.

I know I shouldn't think so much. Buttttt. No one can really ever understand what I needed nor how I feel. It feels like my existence isn't there towards anyone. It's okay, I'm getting too used to this. Nobody really ever cared, even if they pretend that they're the best, I know it. Nobody have been really true to me, I guess so. People around me.. Their words are so contradicting, and you can never comprehend what is in their mind.

Whenever it seems that I'm happy, everything around me that I feel is surreal. There's this over-capacity of I don't know what in me that's making me feel so moody. I'm not hard to please, but some of them never knows. Even when it's so obvious. Maybe I'm thinking this way because I never felt loved and cared for? I don't know.. But I don't really wanna know either. Shall just maintain these at this stage right now. Just hoping for further improvements. But then again, it's just a wish.

I'm always a pessimist.

And will still be.

Back to Square 1

2010-04-26T22:00:00.002+08:00

Do you have people around you that perpetually don't understand you but act like they do ohsowell? How come I get used, get blamed, get pint pointed, get laughed at. Just because I'm weak, I'm not a pretty face, I'm some typical girl to you, I'm dumb? Yeah being around you seriously kills my mood.

I love my fav girls. They never fail to make my day although we were really shag. Pictures from Saturday.

I miss everything.. Really miss everything.

I love you, Natasha, Natassha, Narisha, XiHong, Ira, ZhiKyan. Thanks for always being there.

It's so hard to be back standing strong again. When was the last time I was REALLY happy? Idk. I need a sleepover with my favourite girls.

Sleeping is such a big thing

2010-04-20T13:01:00.001+08:00

Am in class now.. I'm just so bored and sleepy... Tryna keep myself by all means but I just can't... Have been sleeping for almost all lessons.. Can't.take.it!!! Can yawn 2 times in 10 seconds. This is how tired I am.. And, today's lessons are a bore. Still have plans to study later on. Well for now, I shall just sit and day dream until school's over. Too lethargic. Having blood rush every now and then. Perpentually.. I will faint. At least, I hope so. Stupid chem tchr I hate school soooo much :( but.. Idk. Yeah just tired. Not bad, I managed to kill some time and the bell just rang, another half an hour till lessons end. Yay.

We flew to Rome

2010-04-18T18:36:00.001+08:00

Photo spamage alert ;)

Out with Reeca and Natassha yesterday was a bomb! Couldn't stop laughing cause I was soooo tired. Deprived of sleep!

While waiting for the flight to Rome...

When in Rome :D

Coming back to Sg...

And some to kill your eyes..

I had fun, sooo much fun but really tired. Ciaoz

Loose control

2010-04-15T21:07:00.001+08:00

I’m not the type to get my heart broken
I’m not the type to get upset and cry
Coz I never leave my heart open
Never hurts me to say goodbye
Relationships don’t get deep to me
Never get the whole in love thing
If someone could say love me truly
But at the time it didn’t mean a thing

My mind is gone
I’m spinnin’ around
And deep inside
My tears I’ll drown
I’m losing grip
What’s happening?
I stray from love
This is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And they cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I’m in this condition
And I’ve got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you’ll never see me cry

Did it happen when we first kissed?
coz its hurting me to let it go
maybe coz we spent so much time
and I know that it’s no more
I should have never let u hold me baby
Maybe why I’m so sad to see us apart
I didn’t give it to u on purpose
Gotta figure out how u stole my heart

My mind is gone
I’m spinnin’ around
And deep inside
My tears I’ll drown
I’m losing grip
What’s happening?
I stray from love
This is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And they cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I’m in this condition
And I’ve got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you’ll never see me cry

How did I get here with you?
I’ll never know
I never meant to let it get so personal
And after all I tried to do
To stay away from love with you
I’m broken-hearted
I can’t let you know
And I Won’t Let It Show
You won’t see me cry

This time was different
Felt like I was just a victim
And they cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now I’m in this condition
And I’ve got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you’ll never see me cry

Now I’m in this condition
And I’ve got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you’ll never see me cry

All my life

Kinda like how I'm feeling now. But not relationships.

You'll never see me cry

Love is about sacrificing

2010-04-15T01:44:00.000+08:00

I just have to rant so much..

Don't know how long have it been since I last cried. Say, 2months? I've been really strong, but well, life is tearing me apart now.

I quarrelled with R, for some fucking stupid reasons. Anyway, I don't know whether you'll be reading this, but yeah here it goes.

Please stop worrying so much about me, I don't appreciate a single bit. And I'm alr 15 so I know my limits and know what I'm suppose to do. And, don't talk to my friends about me. I don't care whether you guys chit chat, but don't bullshit and crap about me. Btw, you don't have any rights to say about me, nor my friends. Well, at least not anymore. I've gotten over this relationship quite a long time ago, just ranting this out so I'll feel better.

Sweet I'm tipsy, thanks 2bears. Love beer love the feeling yeah yeah yeah whoo I'm in need of it

Been three old days since I had sleep

2010-04-12T23:24:00.001+08:00

Life... Has been really bad for me. My back is aching like shit. But no matter how shitty is life... There have always been that few who stood by me! Am very very touched *inserts gazillion hugs* Am gna go learn roller blade now (:P) and do it to schl every morning! Just felt like updating, goodbye

In.saint.

2010-04-09T20:52:00.000+08:00

Apologize for another series abandoning my blog. But still, my life is still screwed, however much improvement?

Am very glad to be back at home, and I'll be updating kinda regularly already! But...

Fucking depressed now, I've grown 3kg in 4months, and 2kg more to being overweight. Yeah have to start my diet plan NOW!! Feel like killing myself from eating so much, losing self-confidence in myself. Fuck it.

Anyhow, pictures from Danial's birthday party.

This will somehow be a short entry I guess.... How unlucky can you get? Don't be like me, my life sucks to the max. So many things are beyond control. Well just fuck it.

I wanna fly away from Singapore so much....

Love you Ree.

We've come to this far

2010-04-08T22:14:00.001+08:00

Have so many thoughts to note down... But I can't express it when I come to this page.

Everything's gonna be over

2010-03-24T23:08:00.006+08:00

Edited

Here's a long post in order to show my apology for disappearing from the cyber world without any news!

So I had only 3 main events that happened during March break. Camp, DanceWorks and Danial's birthday. The other days were fine, just that I had to attend a wake so it went gone case. Life's good with just that few people by my side, I mean, what's the use of having so many fake friends when you can have a clique of good friends?

Happy girl me got a BB! Like finally! ;) hehe. And I really wanna thank Ting and Gaga for the help they gave. I mean, which friend would come down in the wee hours just to help you go to the rubbish dump and actually literally DIG and touch all the dirty things (with BARE HANDS!!!) just for you? Touching cockroaches, vomits, gross things you can never imagine, all just because they promised you. Really very touched :))) wonder what's my holiday like w/o the group of ppl!

Enough of all that...

Helped out the Inc. team for their DanceWorks performance, getting up as early as 5.30 to help them!

Them without makeup and hairdos!

So me & Syairah started to help people smacking makeup :) Hairdos! Also the part where the cameraman tells them what must they do

Cute! Hahaha

Iffah manager speaking to him :)

Getting ready for filming!

In the midst of filming!

Sitting down and chit chatting, seems like they're not tensed eh?

Crowding around the barrier

Hungry, so took lunch break @ KFC

Met the Cybernatics Club!

So the rest came down about 12+?

Dancing!

Judges giving opinions...

Anyhowz, they were awesome in dancing! Although it wasn't sync enough, but the overall was great kay?!

Spastic

Hamsters FTW!

Bby!

Random group of boys

Continuing with the cam whores...

Now you can see how horny the N.A(s) are!

Very adorable couple!

Break-dancers!

Now for individual shots....

HAHHAAHAAH

And after everything, we wanted to leave for Farah's house but last minute decision of not going? So I rushed back to AMK to catch a movie with da boyz.

So sweet right! Makes me wanna have a boyfriend again! Hahah living for 2months without a boyfriend now! Kay kidding.

More individual shots...

Bestieeee!

DONE! Not exactly, still have Danial's party one.. But still! Very big job done! So proud of myself. Outing with Reeca tmrw yay! Love her, luckily we have da same stylez! (:

I'll be back soon to update! Don't say I abandon this crappy space already.

2010-03-04T20:50:00.000+08:00

You don't have to call, anymore, I won't pick up the phone. This is the last straw, don't wanna hurt anymore.

You're Not Sorry - Taylor Swift

Very meaningful song

I'm your bad romance

2010-03-03T18:11:00.001+08:00

Hi. My life is boring now and my laptop is not fixed yet so no updates! March already but I've learned to take things simpler and easier now!

Lappy oh lappy when can you be fixed? :(

Pls make time on 14th March and head down to Plaza Sing okay?!?! DanceWorks! Come downnnnn luvs!

Violet pink

2010-02-24T21:30:00.001+08:00

Mundane day, mundane life! My laptop's really cranking me up so I haven't been able to tumblr and I need to squinch my eyes when I type this. Everything's like line streaks here and there and the resolution is off place. But gotta live with it until mum repairs it and I hope I'll get a new one soon :)))

1/2 way there to getting a BB hope my mum allows :( I need a new phone. My current one is on the verge on dying. SE is just too bad for quality.

School life have been really good :) Able to pass almost everything I guess. Some subjects are hopeless towards me already. Wahahah.

Today have been really good for me though I've sprained my ankle and I'm going to the sinseh tmrw... But it was good and kinda worth it actually :P

And this is towards you :))

I can rave about you all day long. Because you never fail to make me smile even on my weakest days and gumpiest me. I love the way we are now and just want it to continue like this. Your smile is just too irresistable. It just makes me grin and grin from chin to cheek. Oh how I glance at you from far distance and how we chat so much even for the simplest things. I'm falling for you ~ It's just the though of you that makes me wanna smile. I miss you already! Your existence is far too important and I want it to be this way forever :)

It feels so good to be in love or even fall passionately in love again :)

I'll come back with a proper post soon. Nothing has been coming up.

Thoughts sinking away

2010-02-20T23:53:00.002+08:00

've decided no more emo post on here. Go to my tumblr instead.

Now I'm picking up the pieces

2010-02-19T20:36:00.001+08:00

Being happy isn't easy but you can try. No harm in doing it....

That's the cause of a girl being EXTREMELY bored I can't help it but there was nothing I could do except text and be a cam whore.

So here are the pics for CNY... Not many but then I had a great CNY this year although second day of it was really bad but it's ok! I love my cousins ~

Claire!

When was the last time I ever smiled truly happily?

Being happy is the key to success

2010-02-18T22:10:00.000+08:00

Oli Skye why are you so cute ~ I wonder how many hours of pain did you went through for the tattoos. I love you and your tattoos ~

I cannot find my usb port for my camera so no CNY pics yet... Just reviving a bit of my soon-gonna-be dead blog.

Lovin' life the way it is.

Sins and tragedy

2010-02-12T15:34:00.000+08:00

I realise I make friends more easily now. Having a terrible headache and this post is just random. I'm tired, sleepy. But today, I was happy.

I bare my teeth

2010-02-08T20:28:00.001+08:00

I went home with Zhi Hen(g)(?) today after CCA and he's in Sec 1 express. I told him my 'life story' throughout the whole journey home and I realised how much I have seriously changed. As in c.h.a.n.g.e. In terms of appearance, thinking, sense. I thought him how to study well because I've regretted but it's not too late yet. I still have 2 more years.

My Maths have improved... Not a lot but I tried at least. I can't stop studying now because I know if I don't wake up I can't and will not anymore. My mind for the past 2 years in Secondary school was malfunctioning. To think that I can go to the extend of thinking that studies are not important and not everything. But I realise today how tough is it for me to handle my foundations in work and studies, even life. I depend too much on others to comforting me when I'm down. I can't pluck myself up or even stand on the right path properly.

Because of that 20min journey bus ride with Zhi Hen(g) home I saw my true self. Wanting to study even harder and told him not to regret like me. Miss Vannessa said today, "Hurt is not about boyfriend girlfriend saying you're ugly or what, it is regret." I think not studying hard and go into express was really a big mistake and only now I've woken up, it's too late. But still, it's only start of the term and I can still repent on my mistakes. With my friends helping me now I can change and I will work harder. This CA1 I might not score well but SA1 I will do my best into improving on my results.

Getting into Lasalle is still my dream but I've to focus on my studies now. I hope my future will be better because there are people bugging me to study whenever I don't. But I still have work and sometimes I just feel like quitting. I'm all too stress now I can go berserk any time any moment. Handling situations and all, and worst of all I'm so accident-prone. I can cut myself without knowing and the next minute I can blood all over my fingers and hand. Slacked too much during sec 1 & 2 so now I've got to buck up. It still isn't too late, or is it?

They're still dying

2010-02-03T18:36:00.004+08:00

Saturday spent fruitfully.

The very first photo with him for the past 3 years!

That day was really fun and I felt awesome, though memories were where it seem to be placed at. We danced and run under the rain, eating the awesome sausage roll by Danial and spagetthi by Iffah, sitting and chit chatting, and for most of us were cam whores, so that explains the handful amount of pics, more in FB! I finally uploaded the photos cause most of them are expecting me to send it to them.

School has been a real torture to me. Struggling so hard to catch up, I don't catch a thing in Maths/Physics/Chem/History/SS/DnT, almost everything you can say so. Sitting beside Jasper in Maths is super stress although he can help me but he makes me feel so dumb. And talking to Xi Hong for almost every lesson lightens up my feelings.

Never did I feel so great in school for last month and today is such a nice date! I loved today and I hope that this feeling stay forever inside, although I'm still nursing everything I've broken. I'll be so pack this week but I love being busy, helps me keep my ~~stress~~ thoughts away.

Cheer up people, life's still great ahead.

Click

2010-01-28T19:20:00.001+08:00

I miss all of you guys so freaking much:( Miss class chalet as well. Sighz when will we have the bond-ness again!

Walao I think I really very fat already.
&, how I miss everything so much. Perseverance is a very strong word, so is change.

I found a reason for me

2010-01-26T20:48:00.003+08:00

I'm getting real bored at home so I decided to whip up a long-boring-wordy post.

First things first, I collected my camera from the doc's! :D Sadly, the amount could buy me tons of stuffs. Initially I intended to save up the sum of money so I could pay for my stuffs like braces and all. But... Whatever still! I'm student, 3 digits is a lot since I worked my life for it, so I doubt not many people will feel my pain. But well at least I don't raise out my hand to take money from my parents.

I wonder why I think from a different perspective of view.. I don't know. Everything seems stuck up and all. Despite me halfway forgetting the whole relationship things, it seems like everything is going against me and I'm tumbling my way downhill when I'm halfway reaching to my goal.

So I think I have a big decision to make. Of course I must make sure that Lasalle accepts 15yr old? If they do... I might just drop out of Secondary school and go there. Without my 'O' level cert. It is very risky, because once I fail there wouldn't be and back up solutions for me and I will perhaps have to waste my whole life. Pros and cons actually. But cons are more. Of course I would miss my friends and all, but, for my future? I'm v v v interested honestly. But I doubt I can adapt to that type of lifestyle. Plus everything hasn't settle down for me yet.

I've been clinging onto my friends for hopes and support. I just can say they are the best? So I rather stick to my social circle of friends because I'm rather uncomfortable of being with others. Which friends will be willing to stay by you whenever you need them?! I'm contented with them.

As for school, I've regretted joining Art Club. I think I'm just gonna daydream there... Depressed ttm :

Smashing lipstick

2010-01-25T20:20:00.000+08:00

If everything was so perfect....

Credits to tumblr and weheartit

When you walked out of my life

2010-01-19T19:50:00.000+08:00

My life has been pretty great now. At least with the help of my friends I don't feel so lonely and sad? I'm getting hang of this life now, so I hope I can live with it for as long as I can. Though life has been a tad boring now, but friends never change. Xx

Studying is back and I've to do well no? Aiming for my big goal. Loving everything the way it is now, :)

You'll never see me cry

2010-01-16T22:32:00.001+08:00

Cute no!!

Happy 3 friends, best friends forever. I love you two.

A little bit too much

2010-01-13T19:50:00.000+08:00

Bff for life! :D No pinafore, same hair, whoo I love you babe! :D I'm finally using the lappy and I love it. Been so long since I came into the cyberspace. This is sweet :)))

You outta know

2010-01-08T23:11:00.001+08:00

I doubt I will be blogging any day sooner anymore, shifting house so... I'll be kinda hard to contact I guess? Only way is through my phone, so yap! Bye bye guys~!

Can't stop thinking

2010-01-04T22:53:00.003+08:00

Srsly hate how small my eyes are. Zzz Especially when I smile there're no signs of double eyelids at all Zzz

Me & Reeca's will be coming soon. My photoshop's being a bitch, can't edit the lightings at all Zzz, why is my life so unlucky? I miss babies.

Time have wings

2010-01-03T00:13:00.007+08:00

So on the previous post I've not stated about my class.... Another emotional shxt again but it's just to tell them how much I'll miss having fun with them...

I'll miss seating together with you guys during recess, miss having the noise in class. I can remember the times when we were loitering, Danial coming up with stupid things. Rmbr the times during Sec 1, after every SA2 paper we'd go to AMK park to find "ghost", of course, we rly experience it no? So we wld head down to Macs everyday and have our lunch, which also resulted in burning our pockets. Having Danial's gayness in class together with Ben. Will miss sitting with Ruo Dan, Ben & Xi Hong. Rmbr we used to bully teachers that we don't like. Like talking back to Mrs Tai, everybody who were scared of Mdm Chan. Albert use to stand at the door looking out when the boys or girls were playing cards. I still rmbred Sec 1's class bbq, which was an epic failure becuz we used up like almost 2 boxes of fire starter just to get the charcoal started. I rly miss Ben's fats and cuteness and I guess everybody have grown up now. Sec 1 late, I won Roy in Maths and he had to run around the parade square with a pinafore on.

Of course Danial always asking, "Who wanna go eat @ Macs?" And us heading to Jimm's house havoc-ing his whole room, and everyone loved his mum. Of course I miss Umar & Divya, and not forgetting Ben Lu but I don't rly like him? Becuz of Ben Lu I started calling BenjaminLye Ben Lye cuz it was easier. I miss having so much fun :(( Of course this class chalet had made us so much closer and missing each other so much. Becuz of this chalet everybody knew each other more and more. All the classes were jealous cuz we were so bonded. Creating trouble... Helping each other. I'll miss you guys alot alot. I hope we still can be the same like last time. Although we're just next door apart, but it won't be the same without the same people anymore. I luv you guys so much. Xxx

Ok... To spoil the whole atmosphere, picture spam of this few days :)))))))

Ok that shld be it.... The day before and today's one have gta wait becuz I wanna go sleep! Am so so so tired! Heading to Ikea tmrw happy me! But will be missing movie with Danial & gang :(( Oh well. I haven't got my schl bag. Zzzzzz I don't want Monday to come

I'll survive

2010-01-01T16:19:00.005+08:00

MORPHINEJAB HAS MOVE TO WWW.ELECTRICFYMORPHINE.BLOGSPOT.COM

Ehehe I've kinda missed my last post for 2009.

But to sum up my year, it was a pretty hectic one.This was me when I was last yr. My hair is good ol' short!! And then I was still playing basketball with a proper leg. I was really in to designing web last yr, but now I've lost interests in lots of things.

This year starting I remember I broke my leg. Which was a very huge thing? It costed me also every single thing I had and I also lost interest in playing basketball because I felt that no matter how hard I try I won't be the same anymore. I tried to cheer myself up a bit but you know... (Sadness occurs sometimes) I didn't like a thing.

I got moody and all but! I've changed:) This was quite early in the year when Iffah had bangs. When my belt was still low.. HAHA. I've lost Crystal as a friend, but truly I've learnt that the old don't go, the new don't come. I had many life experiences this year, which I think was awesome. I've gotten much closer to Reeca, Iffah, Ira, Ruo Dan, Danial, Xi Hong, Natasha. They are the ones I can really trust, and normal friends, I've grown a whole lot to them. Well at least I know 2010 will be a very tough one for me. I'll love having Xi Hong as my seating partner in class. Natasha, him, Reeca, Ifah are the best I can talk to. To stand up for me, to show me concern. Well Reeca as my shopping buddy too :D Well I rmbred how I used to hate Ira with Reeca (:P) but now I can say I love them xxx.

As for Ryan, we have been through many many things. In to lying to our parents, him sleeping over @ my place, playing with hammy, him disturbing me when I sleep, tickling him when he's asleep, touching his face and pinching his face. I rmbred we quarrelled and almost broke up on our first year, but Idk? Everything was settled calmly. I knew friends like Karen, Hidayat, Sina, Khairin, Guo Jing, Xiao Min, Andy, Sugan, people who I can talk to when I'm feeling down, especially to Karen & Hidayat.

This yr March/June I got to know my two baby and from then we were inseperable, but now only because I'm moving house that's why they've got to stay with Ryan. Although they're just hamsters they're like my real baby. Waiting for me at the cage door whenever I come home. They've got the total same attitude as me. I love to see how they eat how the bathe and how they sleep. I can talk to them for hours and stare at them for nothing. They understand my mood and will clean my tears when I cry. They always make me smile no matter what. I've lost one of them twice but I still managed to find them. I doubt they will and know how to read this, but I know that they know how much I love them. Brand new cage almost every 3-5 months, good & expensive food, cotton and not hay to sleep on. What a good mother am I!!

After I've broke my leg and couldn't play basketball well anymore, I decided to be more girly girl :P My hair grew long, and many thoughts to dye it (till now!). I got pissed cuz I always gotta wear specs when in class and I look real fugly. So I started contact lens this year (yes slow) and after that I used coloured ones. Till now! :)) Loving it. So perhaps I'm gonna dye and highlite my hair when I'm free. Change is so constant! Only close ones know the change in me. Of course, my attitude towards my family have become much better and I don't get that moody already.

2009 was a real life experience but I hope 2010 will be a good one:)

Thank you all for supporting me when I was a my lowest point of life. I'm a really shy girl so my social circle stays that way. But I've met my first online friend which was Sean :D I can say that he's treats me like a real sister. Well, Ryan's still the old him, forever being jealous heck knows why. Haha.

Of course, not to say, I miss my primary school cliques a whole lot and I hope to see them very very soon :)

When I was in P5.... Hahah. That was Aquila & Shanice. And Eugene behind! Hey I still rmbr his name k. I miss Debby Ziying Shanice Tiff everybody!

Well this is Claire in the last day of 2009 and the first day of 2010 :)

Summarize, I've changed ;)

Plastic Sheets

2009-12-27T00:12:00.000+08:00

Well I think I've accepted the fact and I can't change it no? I know it won't be the same like before already.. But at least us both being happy will be more than enough.

You know... Thinking can be such a big thing!! I love thinking, being in very deep thoughts. I like :)

Loving my life now, how protective I realised everybody is to me. Surreal? Idk. Just wanna spend my last moments of 2009 happily :) I just hope that everything goes out smoothly for me tmrw. *Prays* But I'm still missing the past. Got to move on and start afresh. This will be my last and only chance.

I admit that I'm a LITTLE self-centered, but at least I know my limits. I know how to handle my life even though I need a pillar of support. Who doesn't? You'll break down anyway. Well, life's still a roller coaster :)

Learn to live, live to learn

2009-12-19T17:12:00.000+08:00

I've ended everything, but it was a wise decision, or at least, nobody's gonna suffer from any heartache anymore eh. Still learning to live everything as it was.

I don't wanna be your lover

2009-12-13T21:40:00.002+08:00

Whole chunk of words deleted.

dayswithmyfather.com

2009-12-08T22:11:00.003+08:00

Very interesting site I went to. Makes me treasure more.

Anybody interested in the above? Hand made by me! :D Will do you a new piece of cuz. More pix will be up on MorphineJab soon!

HOMIES! I'm back. Gotta go now, life has been boring ~~~ Support MorphineJab!!

MORPHINE JAB

2009-12-02T22:49:00.001+08:00

MORPHINEJAB.LIVEJOURNAL.COM

Fireflies

2009-11-28T02:37:00.005+08:00

So... my life has been pretty mundane. Life's hard! I feel like blogging 'bout lots of things... Like the weather... My life... Myself! But, I don't have the time to even accompany my friends and baby let alone keeping in touch with the cyberspace. Even my twitter is not updated frequently anymore.

I've taken much time off.... [Well at least because I'm still webcaming with Natasha at this hour - Mind that it's 1:30am now]... So I can cook up a good long entry. At least, I hope I can. So it's gonna be long and boring, unless you are so stalkerishx to know about my life.

Anyway I thought Blogger had something like LJ-Cut but it was some sai jump break thing.

我好累啊，明天下午还有工作，怎么办！！不想上班，真的好累。。有时候想一想钱不是那么容易赚的阿!! Chinese is really tough for me. ~!@#$%

10 random facts about Claire

1) Food is my life

2) -

3) Hate to wait for people who are always late

4) Detest it when people speaks (no matter ill or good) about you but don't have the guts to put your name there and label you as "someone" or "stranger"

5) People who are proud can seriously fuck off

6) I don't rly like to cam whore that much alr

7) I sometimes worship Satan

8) I don't know how to roller blade

9) Need to grow taller

10) MUST.SLIM.DOWN - everyday thinking

I was kidding about the number 7 part. Time check: 2:01am. Eyebags are getting bigger day by day. Sometimes I rly wonder why am I not those type of people who note down every single bit of their life. I hope to be like that

Natasha unglam

Hamsters on the loose

My bro typed it Hahah laughing my ass off

Tired alr, toodles homies

Pimp

2009-11-20T21:59:00.000+08:00

Feel like moving to Lj... Shall do it soon :> Wanna buy lots and lots and lots of clothes ~ How now!! Me need $$ save me